Doctor Kanno. Unliscenced Psychologist

[Wolf Kanno]

If you have no intention of settling down and assholes are just your "thing". I recommend you date me immediately

Good line

But somehow methinks you would make a very poor asshole WK

You got me. Though I can be very surly when I need to be. Sometimes I'm downright bitchy... wait that doesn't sound right...

*laugh*

I have Prom in 3 hours, and consequently, I am going with a very nice, sensitive boy whom I have no attraction to at all, and I feel rather bad about it.

And you're right, I have no intentions of settling down at all, but I don't want to be a cat lady - so I guess it's just my problem!

Thanks Doc'. ^^

I don't mind cats... and I can learn to be an asshole...

I want to have babies.

Are you a woman? If so, find a man an d let nature take it's course.

If you are a man, find yourself a man and adopt a child. Then film a fake birthing so you can truly clinch your denial of not being a woman.

If this was a "sexual advance" on me then shame on you... I don't want kids

Can I be your receptionist?

Certainly... I don't have to pay you though? Not one patient has payed me yet. Until I get payed, no one gets payed

can i be your secretary/wife?

(Note: for Furuba fans... picture Ayame Sohma giving this speech)

The position for secratary has been filled I'm afraid. As for the position for my wife... You have to understand what you are really getting yourself into. My stunning looks, my vast fortune, my need to travel to exotic locations, and of course my pathological lying.

If you can look past these imperfections from me then surly we can join together in fangasmic experience of martial bliss that would truly define the meaning of the "holy sanctity" of marriage. An experience that will fullfill every single one of your emotional, physical, and spiritual pleasures in a way that transcends human experience itself!

I've had this growth called a family unit for a number of years now; however, it has now begun interfering with my personal life.

What might I do to remove this rather large, 19 year old growth?

I've dealt with this before... you have only two options.

1) You need an expensive operation called "moving out" it takes more money than you imagine but perhaps you can find friends or strangers to help pay for it. Luckily the operation price varies but if you pay once with comrades the operation affects all of you.

Now here's the tricky part since the growth tends to follow since it's never completely removed from you if you do this normally. You need to do the operation in secret. Remove your belongings slowly in small, almost unoticeable quantities. Until you only have enough to make one "big move" in less than four hours and in the dark of night. You will have to make excuses to the "growth" as to why things are missing. You will also have to come to the realization that you may have to forsake some things in order to make this successful. Hopefully if all goes according to plan, you will have removed the "growth" in such a way that it can no longer find you.

WARNING!!! If the growth does find you again you will experience greater problems than before you had the operation. In which case, resort ot solution no.2

2) Kill them, then eat them so there is no evidence.

[Odaisé Gaelach]

Doctor, I just got stood up and can't stop feeling miserable about it...

[Christmas]

I dug you a grave, I hope you like it.

[Chemical]

Your diagnosis was about as vague as a newspaper horoscope.




I'll stick to Peanuts.

(SPOILER)Freud isn't actually a type of fish.... it's a pun or whatever... get it? Freud... Fish ;o HOW DARING and WITTY!

[Agrias]

can i be your secretary/wife?

(Note: for Furuba fans... picture Ayame Sohma giving this speech)

The posi<b></b>tion for secratary has been filled I'm afraid. As for the posi<b></b>tion for my wife... You have to understand what you are really getting yourself into. My stunning looks, my vast fortune, my need to travel to exotic locations, and of course my pathological lying.

If you can look past these imperfections from me then surly we can join together in fangasmic experience of martial bliss that would truly define the meaning of the "holy sanctity" of marriage. An experience that will fullfill every single one of your emotional, physical, and spiritual pleasures in a way that transcends human experience itself!

I accept your offer! And i raise 20! Also, what should i wear to a job interview when its an old greek man who has all his waitresses where short skirts? I dont look good in short skirts! -dies-

[Ko Ko]

I NEVER want to have babies because I don't want my future husband (if I ever get one - most guys are asiaphiles nowadays, the morons) to leave me.
Will he leave me if I get all fat like that?

[Wolf Kanno]

Doctor, I just got stood up and can't stop feeling miserable about it...

I'm sorry for your misfortune as I am well aquainted with being stood up. My philosophy is to share your misery by burning something. Watching fire dance about is very theraputic, Especially when the thing that is burning is people

I dug you a grave, I hope you like it.

How nice of you!

This is still not going to count towards your bill from me.

Your diagnosis was about as vague as a newspaper horoscope.




I'll stick to Peanuts.

(SPOILER)Freud isn't actually a type of fish.... it's a pun or whatever... get it? Freud... Fish ;o HOW DARING and WITTY!

See people? Classic symptons of a serial killer!

My diagnosis is a as vague as I choose them to be. It's up to you to come up with the correct answer for yourself. The problem with psychology is that it can't really give you an answer, it gives you data which you have to choose how to use. Only you can really help yourself, I'm only here to direct you in the right path.

can i be your secretary/wife?

(Note: for Furuba fans... picture Ayame Sohma giving this speech)

The position for secratary has been filled I'm afraid. As for the position for my wife... You have to understand what you are really getting yourself into. My stunning looks, my vast fortune, my need to travel to exotic locations, and of course my pathological lying.

If you can look past these imperfections from me then surly we can join together in fangasmic experience of martial bliss that would truly define the meaning of the "holy sanctity" of marriage. An experience that will fullfill every single one of your emotional, physical, and spiritual pleasures in a way that transcends human experience itself!

I accept your offer! And i raise 20! Also, what should i wear to a job interview when its an old greek man who has all his waitresses where short skirts? I dont look good in short skirts! -dies-

I fold! Too rich for my blood

But everyone looks good in miniskirts! If that isn't going to convince you then wear some shorts under the skirt and begin a new fashion sense. If some asks, scream "Sexual Harrasment" and you'll quickly find most people will just let you be.

On a side note, I don't require miniskirts at my job but sexy cocktail dresses. You hear that Acula?

I NEVER want to have babies because I don't want my future husband (if I ever get one - most guys are asiaphiles nowadays, the morons) to leave me.
Will he leave me if I get all fat like that?

I don't think it's you putting on some weight that would scare them as much as it was the "child". Men like "making babies" we don't necessarily have an interest in "raising them" since it requires the "C" word.

Solution: Only date men who have had a vasectomy or are willing to have the procedure

[bipper]

I am in love with an unlicensed psychologist, what do I do?

[Dr. Acula]

Can I be your receptionist?

Certainly... I don't have to pay you though? Not one patient has payed me yet. Until I get payed, no one gets payed

If you give me mocking rights of your patients, that will be pay enough. If you give me bashing rights of your patients, I will overlook the fact I have to wear a skanky cocktail dress.

[Peegee]

Help doctor! I'm in the trunk of a car and it's filling up with water!

[Wolf Kanno]

I am in love with an unlicensed psychologist, what do I do?

It's a good thing you came to me to talk about such a serious topic. Don't bother. Let me be the first to tell you that all unliscenced psychologist are dead beat losers who like to belittle others in a sad attempt to bring meaning to their pathetic existence. I don't know who this person is but take my advice not to bother unless alcohol and loneliness are invloved.

Can I be your receptionist?

Certainly... I don't have to pay you though? Not one patient has payed me yet. Until I get payed, no one gets payed

If you give me mocking rights of your patients, that will be pay enough. If you give me bashing rights of your patients, I will overlook the fact I have to wear a skanky cocktail dress.

Certainly, I wouldn't have it any other way. I prefer my skanky co-workers to be bitchy and nasty like myself.

[Bunny]

I have died. What should I do now?

[Dr. Acula]

I have died. What should I do now?

Haha! Shame!! *bashes*
I love my job.

[bipper]

I am in love with an unlicensed psychologist, what do I do?

It's a good thing you came to me to talk about such a serious topic. Don't bother. Let me be the first to tell you that all unliscenced psychologist are dead beat losers who like to belittle others in a sad attempt to bring meaning to their pathetic existence. I don't know who this person is but take my advice not to bother unless alcohol and loneliness are invloved.

smurf me now.

[Nominus Experse]

I took a bath, but I used bleach instead of water...
I now have no skin. This seems to be a problem.

I have also noticed that this small critter



has attached itself to my right testicle.